tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85248837564987527432012-02-16T07:49:42.064-06:00My journey beyond forgiving my violators into the process of healing, deliverance and liberty in Christ.LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.comBlogger231100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-10962858383679532622007-11-18T08:52:00.000-06:002007-11-18T09:41:12.416-06:00

A sense of unworthiness is a terrible feeling. How do I know?You guessed it, I have been there.Just like intimidation, feelings of unworthiness are paralyzing, but in a different way. For years I would not share with others what I do and if I did share I downplayed it often. You know, making it appear unimportant.Do you know that God is not glorified in that?You see when God gives us talents,

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-39127382055621100172007-10-01T15:19:00.000-06:002007-10-01T15:51:22.335-06:00

It's been a while since I have blogged. Why?I am not really sure.I have been examining my life by talking to God about what He sees. What I have seen can be called residuals of life in the pit.Residuals are those things that are a direct result of living in a dark pit filled with dirt and a great deal of mess. For me the residuals of being thrown in the pit caused me to lose a lot of precious

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-24421123937260695502007-08-11T13:10:00.001-06:002007-08-11T13:10:48.091-06:00

After my experience with the young girl who did not commit suicide because of my testimony, decided it was time to tell mom about what had occurred.That was one of the most liberating confessions I have ever made. For over 30 years I have been keeping this from mom. After telling her this truth she began to understand why I was so hateful towards men and why I had so many emotional ups and down.

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-9630403413306756142007-08-10T23:15:00.001-06:002007-08-10T23:15:46.550-06:00

For those who do not know this about me; I am a speaker, facilitator ofGod's Word,podcast producer and host. My main platform is teachingothers to be proactive in the choices they make in life.Thispast Sunday I spoke to a group a teens about spiritual gifts, talents,and purpose. I shared my testimony about molestation and notunderstanding why God allowed it in my life. I told the teens it

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-28820101929526615532007-07-28T14:01:00.000-06:002007-07-28T14:16:13.656-06:00

I am fearfully and wonderfully made!So why did I play the victim for 38 years? Convenience? To get empathy? To look like a martyr?What ever the reasons, God has told me it time out for playing the victim.I am more than a conqueror!So why did I live my life so defeated? Fear of coming out of the box? Fear of change? Fear of failure? Fear of me?What ever the reasons, God has told me that I have no

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-73669704654241029882007-07-28T13:48:00.000-06:002007-07-28T14:01:04.152-06:00

Healing!When I came here this afternoon I was struck by the fact that I have changed so much in the last few months. I guess when you truly get sick and tired, you really do.It was my rock bottom....just being sick and tired.That is what happened with me. As result of my reaching my rock bottom I asked God to show me what to do and to work with me, in me, and on me because I could not live this

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-51367838428146526882007-07-20T20:26:00.000-06:002007-07-20T20:45:33.986-06:00

...and ye know in all your hearts and in all your souls, that not one thing hath failed of all the good things which Jehovah your God spake concerning you; all are come to pass unto you, not one thing hath failed thereof. Joshua 23:14I did not accept Christ until I was 20 years old; that was 18 years ago.However, as a little girl and all

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-83823783254075208122007-07-20T20:04:00.000-06:002007-07-20T20:21:21.457-06:00

You know when someone gets to know me they notice that I will start to build a wall. Many have asked me why.Especially me husband!You see after 5 years I am just beginning to really let him in. I can't even look my husband in the eyes and that is really sad. That is a level of intimacy that is really difficult for me. I don't like vulnerability and yet people see it in me all the time.It's all

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-69051670423760833372007-07-19T14:44:00.000-06:002007-07-19T14:45:41.415-06:00

The ability to apologize!It took me along time to be so bold to say "I'm sorry" but once I started doing it I felt that much more liberated.

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-12983581847640565502007-07-13T20:18:00.000-06:002007-07-20T20:47:14.054-06:00

About two years ago I heard Pastor Rebecca Simmons speak on picking up your little girl.I realized during that talk that I had left my little girl back in that bedroom and never went back to pick her up. Leaving her there caused so many years of unnecessary heartache. The little girl I left in that room was not the little girl that I took with me.The little girl I took with me grew up too fast.

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-67311438706256695342007-06-29T20:30:00.000-06:002007-06-29T20:33:31.067-06:00

Being in my right mind. If it had not been for the Lord on my side, I truly do not know where I would be.I thank God for transforming my mind from a promiscuous being with a desire to be needed by the man instead of the "MAN"! Because my mind is renewed my life is so much better.

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-65993525736855211312007-06-22T21:07:00.000-06:002007-07-20T20:50:28.419-06:00

Just about anyone who was molested will tell you that you always seek that feeling you got when someone touched you.God designed our bodies to respond to certain touches that would arouse us sexually. However, that was for a time between a man and his wife; not a hunter and his prey. So when a young child's body is vandalized it can make things really confusing because the touch does feel good.As

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-33221652175061939702007-06-15T21:14:00.000-06:002007-06-15T21:22:17.581-06:00

A moment to just smile!A smile says so much and it is infectious!A smile says I love you without saying a word.A smile says that life is OK!A smile is like a flower....it blooms into sheer beauty.Praise God for the frown turned upside down!

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-57444588859442622222007-06-15T20:54:00.000-06:002007-06-15T21:08:58.366-06:00

I can remember a little girl telling me about her uncle molesting her and how she tried to jump off of a roof and end it all. I held on to her tightly....I understood her pain.I know that feeling well. I thought about suicide often, even had a bottle of bleach in my hand ready to guzzle it down. I thought that if I ended it then I would not have to deal with all the pain any longer. I thought it

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-5233756908141959742007-06-08T20:37:00.000-06:002007-06-08T20:43:04.204-06:00

Two boys who are learning what I did not at their age. Their worth in Christ and the value they have in knowing that God wants them to live wih Him forever! Teach your children daily to admonish the Lord and rest in His peace!

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-17152300255571071242007-06-08T11:16:00.000-06:002007-06-08T20:37:30.700-06:00

You never realize just how much junk is in your life until you start to face yourself!Sure a lot of it entered into my life unwillingly, but as I got older I had a choice to change. I chose not to work on it. I just kept sweeping it under a rug and ignoring the small pile forming. Eventually it turned into a huge pile of toxic trash.Bitterness, anger, promiscuity, manipulation, lying, and so much

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-21205107048618990462007-05-29T13:19:00.001-06:002007-05-29T13:20:26.094-06:00

A husband I can grow with. We have both grown during this last 5 years and God is so in the midst.The Word of God in my life.Freedom in Christ.

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-19412130752237507762007-05-29T12:34:00.000-06:002007-05-29T13:15:51.097-06:00

When my step-brother had sex with me and beat me for the last time, I stayed away from my Dad's house for two years. I would not go over there anymore anymore. At this time I was about 6 or 7 and while the molestation stopped with my step-brother, it continued with a neighbor who would babysit me and told me that I was his secret girlfriend and we would play boyfriend/girlfriend games almost

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-66572861354098209182007-05-25T20:08:00.000-06:002007-05-25T20:12:37.112-06:00

My life!In spite of it all, I am here. I am destined to be more than I ever dreamed and I am grateful that I have a chance to make a difference with my life.I am grateful for all the small things because they say so much.I am grateful for my sons who are my biggest encouragers. They help me to heal.I am grateful for my Sister Circle, the ladies who give me a place to bleed, but keep me from

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-9252562877537538192007-05-25T09:04:00.000-06:002007-05-25T09:47:04.150-06:00

Last night I attended a Pink Collar Club book of the month call. The book of the month is Beth Moore's Get Out of the Pit. I have yet to read the book and kept saying I need to get it.The call last night reminded me that I did not put myself into the pit, but that I was thrown into the pit. WOW! I did not put myself here.However, at 38 it is time for me to get myself out of this pit. Why?

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-55328649075141241992007-05-24T10:05:00.000-06:002007-05-25T08:56:23.608-06:00

When you are molested every ounce of your innocence is snatched away from you.This past Sabbath afternoon I was in the living room having a family discussion as we do every Sabbath. Suddenly that thought came to me and I got up, went into my room, closed the door, and broke down in tears.Then I started journaling.As a child you don't realize that the innocence was stolen, but it is. Your life

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-37899598163572713042007-05-21T23:19:00.000-06:002007-05-25T09:01:41.053-06:00

"Everyone needs a place to bleed."Marilyn GriffithToday I have the privilege of interviewing Christian Fiction author Marilyn Griffith for one of my freelance assignments.The quote I used above was so on time for me in my walk.We do all need a place to bleed. Now just what does this mean?Here is my take.As children of God we tend to put on this air and make like all is well, when it is really not

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8524883756498752743.post-3471499740334927852007-05-18T12:56:00.000-06:002007-05-18T18:43:33.741-06:00

So many years are wasted on just forgiving and not progressing past that point. When someone does something to us we forgive and say we have moved on.Have we really?For me it started when I was in my twenties after accepting Christ in 1989 I started on a journey towards change in my life...proactive change. This led me to kneeling at the foot of my bed and forgiving every one of the five

LaTara Ham-Yinghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14770832378460951438noreply@blogger.com1